Choosing Wedding Music

Choosing the music that will be played at your wedding is one of the most important decisions you’ll make. A great band or dj can spice up a reception and ensure that everyone has a ball.

Before you begin your search ask your friends if they have anyone they’d recommend. If you’ve been to any weddings yourself recently and enjoyed the music you can try contacting the band or dj that played. A large percentage of their business comes from referrals.

Dj or Band?

If you can’t decide whether you’d like a dj or a band to provide your wedding music, here are some things to consider:

No matter how good the dj is he won’t be able to create the same excitement level as a live band would.

Bands will require breaks while djs can have the music going non-stop.

If you want to play different types of music at your wedding a band may have trouble transitioning. Many are only able to play certain genres well. They may perform your favorite song poorly.

A dj will have literally thousands of songs at his disposal and they will be performed by the original artist rather than an imitation.

Bands typically cost several times more than djs. The larger the band, the higher the price. Don’t forget you’ll usually have to pay for their meal at the reception too.

A great specialty band can really make a wedding fun, especially if you are looking for ethnic or themed music. A Scottish wedding just wouldn’t be the same without live bagpipes.

Whether you decide on live band or a dj, you’ll have to pick out your favorite songs for them to play at specific times. Here is a list of those special songs and a few suggestions for each:

The Bride and Groom’s First Dance - All My Life by Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville, Forever & For Always by Shania Twain, At Last by Etta James.

Father & Daughter Dance - Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle, Unforgettable by Natalie Cole, My Girl by The Temptations, Isn’t She Lovely by Stevie Wonder.

Mother & Son Dance - What a Wonderful World by Louis Armstrong, A Song for Mama by Boyz II Men, Through the Years by Kenny Rogers.

Cutting the Cake - You’re My Best Friend by Queen, Sixty-Four by The Beatles, I Got You Babe by Sonny and Cher.

Bouquet Toss - Man! I Feel Like a Woman by Shania Twain, Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper, Get the Party Started by Pink.

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How to Give a Great Wedding Toast

So your best friend is getting married. He’s finally tying the knot and he’s asked you to be the best man.You’ll be standing at his side as he says his vows at the ceremony, but at the reception it will be you that everyone is watching.
The wedding toast is a time-honored tradition and as the best man you’ll be expected to give a good one.

Here’s some advice on how to give a memorable wedding toast:

Prepare ahead of time. Even if you are the type of guy who can stand up and speak about anything and everything without even blinking an eye, a wedding toast is a little different than a sales presentation. There will be a lot of emotion in the room and you’ll be in front of a different crowd than at a board meeting. If you expect to speak off the top of your head you may wind up crashing and burning.

Start preparing early. Give yourself plenty of time to edit and revise. You don’t want to find yourself scrambling form something to say at the last minute.

Practice. Time yourself as you give the speech in front of a mirror. And have a friend listen to your speech and offer opinions. Make sure you are speaking clearly and that you are not talking too fast or too slowly.

Steer clear of one-liners and jokes. Instead, focus on stories from the couple’s past. You probably already have a good number of stories you can share about the groom. Childhood stories are always remembered well and they can show the character of the groom as well as how he got to where he is today.

If you haven’t had a chance to get to know the bride, you can always ask her friends nd family for a few stories or anecdotes from her past. Sprinkle in a few words about how perfect the couple is together and you’re all set. Another option, depending on the couple, is to read a poem extolling the virtues of marriage. You can find many examples on the internet, and it does not have to be overly sappy.

Remember your audience. There will likely be older relatives and children present. Use judgement in your language and in the stories you share. Using a little humor is fine. But launching into profanities or stories of wild sex escapades will only make your speech memorable for all the wrong reasons.

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Wedding Food

Your caterer can make or break your wedding. If the meat is overcooked and the chicken is rubbery your guests will go home disappointed. But if the food is top-notch, they won’t be able to stop talking about it. It’s been three years since my wedding and I still get compliments from friends on how much they enjoyed the Jumbo Shrimp and the Lamb Chops!

Food will also be one of your biggest wedding expenses so you’ll want to be sure you get enough bang for your buck. Many reception halls that specialize in weddings have their own cook staff on hand and will handle all of the details for you. If not, you’ll have to find your own caterer.

Whichever you decide, there are a few questions you should ask when you meet with them:

What is the cost per head? Do children receive a discounted rate?

Is gratuity included or is there an extra charge?

How many entree selections will be offered? Typically you are allowed a fish, a beef, and a chicken dish.

Do they have a liquor license or do you have to supply your own?

Will they also supply the linens, glasses, silverware, etc?

You may also want to consider serving your wedding food buffet style. It is usually cheaper than a sit-down meal and this way your guests can try a little of everything.

If you do choose a sit-down dinner, you can expect something like the following:

The evening will start with a cocktail hour where the guests can mingle and serve themselves buffet style. Popular items to serve at this time include fresh fruit, assorted cheeses, fried calamari, and various butler served hor’deurves. There may also be sous chefs manning pasta stations or meat-carving stations, and the bar will open for the guests.

Once the cocktail hour ends, the guests will find their seats so the bride and groom can make their entrance. After the standard first dances, the best man (and sometimes the maid of honor) will make a champagne toast. Children are usually given some sparkling cider so they can participate too.

After the toast soup or salad is served. Often this will be followed by Intermezzo, which a small serving of sorbet that is meant to cleanse the palate before the entree is served.

Up next is the main course, in which it is customary to give guests a choice of entrees.

Following dinner, coffee is served and the wedding cake is cut. Some couples also choose to have a Venetian Hour. This is an extended dessert that includes all sorts of cakes, pastries, and fresh fruit. You can even add specialty items such as a zeppole station or an ice-cream station. Alcoholic beverages may or may not be served during dessert.

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Wedding and Engagement Rings

The tradition of exchanging wedding rings is highly symbolic. The strength of the metals from which they
are made symbolize the strength of the bond between you and your loved one. They are also a symbol of your love, which like the ring has no beginning or end.

Hopefully you’ll have your rings for the rest of your lives, and you may even pass them on to your children. You’ll want to be sure you will be happy with your choices.

The Engagement Ring

Shopping for an engagement ring can be pretty scary. Most guys are not well-versed on the subject of diamonds and jewelry, and its not easy to invest a large sum of money in
something you know little about. Here are a few pointers to help you out:

1. While some couples go ring shopping together, many men prefer the old-school way of picking out an engagement ring themselves. But you can still get your sweetie’s input if you are paying attention. Even if you think you are surprising her, odds are that she knows something is up and has already dropped a few hints as to what kind of ring she’d like.

2. Look at the jewelry she wears. If she wears mostly silver or white gold, that should tell you that she’d prefer a band of white gold or platinum.

3. Ask her girlfriends, sisters, or mom for advice. They might have some useful suggestions. Does she prefer one large solitaire stone or would she like smaller diamonds on each side? What about shape? Does she like round, oval, pear, etc?

4. It’s very important to go to a reputable jeweler, and make sure they are certified by the Jewelers of America (JA) and the Gemological Institute of America (GIA). I don’t recommend ring shopping at the mall. The stones are usually lesser quality with inflated prices.

5. Be sure the ring has its paperwork. You should receive a diamond-grading report from the GIA that cleary indicates its size, shape, clarity, and any imperfections it may have.

Choosing Wedding Bands

You probably already have a good idea of the type of wedding ring you’d like. Do you just want a simple gold band or would you prefer a band with a design. You can also add diamonds or other gemstones, though that will add to the cost.

In terms of color, the basic choices are yellow gold, white gold, and platinum. Yellow gold is the most traditional ring metal, but platinum and white gold are catching up in the popularity department. The average person can not even tell platinum and white gold apart. They have a similar silver color, though the platinum is heavier and the metal is harder and more durable.

Don’t feel as though you have to pick out matching wedding bands. Its okay if you and your significant other have different tastes when it comes to jewelry. Its important that you each choose a wedding ring you like and will feel comfortable wearing.

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Choosing a Wedding Location

For some people choosing where to get married is the easiest decision they can make. If they belong to a church or have always dreamed of getting married at a certain place, there’s not much for them to think about. But for many others the choice is not so obvious.

Your best bet is to start looking around for a location as soon as possible. It can take time to find a place that has everything you are looking for. Ask friends and family for recommendations and browse websites that cater to your area.

Keep in mind that churches and reception halls book up fast, especially for the summer months. If you don’t start looking at least a year in advance you may have trouble finding a location with an availability. And if you are having your ceremony and reception in different locations you’ll have to
worry about coordinating the dates and times carefully.

Some other things to keep in mind when choosing a wedding
location include:

You should have at least a rough idea of how many guests you can expect to attend before choosing a location. You’ll need to be sure that the site can accomodate your needs.

If you have guests who are older or disabled, make sure there are restrooms that are accessible to them. If the only restroom is up 2 flights of stairs, there could be problems.

Is there an area for taking photographs? If not you might have to have them taken offsite.

Who will be supervising and troubleshooting on your wedding day? If possible meet him ahead of time. You’ll need to trust him to handle any little emergencies that pop up.

Is there a room available for the bride and groom to relax and freshen up?

If the location outdoors do they have a backup plan in case of rain?

Destination Weddings

A destination wedding is when you travel to a special place to get married. Presumably, its a place that you’ve been to and loved or a place you’ve always wanted to see.

This is a great option to cut costs as your guest list will likely only include close friends and family. This will depend of course on how far and how exclusive your destination is.

When planning a destination wedding be sure to research the marriage laws of the place you are traveling to. Some countries have laws that require you to be a resident or to submitting to tests before tying the knot on their soil.

It would be a great shame to travel a great distance only to find out that they won’t let you get married there.

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